According to Jill Abramson
 Reporting’s getting sloppy
 From rip and read to rip and write
 On down to clip and copy
  
 She edited The New York Times
 She knows of what she speaks
 No one does reporting now
 They only process leaks
  
 They write in the emphatic
 And not in the declarative
 And jettison the facts
 Because the facts don’t fit the narrative
  
 They lack the breadth of knowledge
 That makes reports effective
 They lack a sense of history 
 Or notion of perspective
  
 The folks who run the J schools
 Have made the crisis this is
 Graduates who make the grade
 Don’t know who Alger Hiss is
  
 They haven’t read the Looming Tower
 Much less the Bill of Rights
 The last to leave the printed word
 Please turn out the lights
  
 O, for the days when newsrooms
 Were two steps from Gomorrah
 And scribes wore their credentials
 In the brim of their fedora
  
 When all the news that’s fit to print
 Was what you had to know
 And if you read it in The Sun
 You knew that it was so.
  
 Long ago Virginia asked
 If old Nick was a saint
 Sad to say, Virginia
 If it’s in The Sun, he ain’t