In a world that’s driven by 
Container ships and cargoes
We’re told that nothing good can come
From tariffs and embargoes
 
From back in fifth grade civics
The memories still stab me
Of farmers, smiths, and sailors
Waving signs that said “O Grab Me”
 
France and Britain battled
So, the bill our Congress made
Attempted to get even with
Belligerent blockade
 
Crops would rot on levees
And the markets were depressed
Citizens took notice
Even seamen were impressed
 
Nothing could be traded
Not a bear skin, not a fossil
Nothing was accomplished
And the losses were colossal
 
That Congress learned its lesson
And the others followed suite
That is, of course, until the day
That Hawley met with Smoot
 
Now, the Trump proposals
Trigger Democrat attacks
Who say that they hate tariffs
Even though they love to tax
 
They’ll raise the tax on anything
(That’s in their marching orders)
But not to help our workers
Or to reinforce our borders
 
I claim no expertise in
International relations
So, I leave it to The Donald
To conduct negotiations
 
To you who gave us NAFTA
And embraced the TPP
Don’t handicap the dealer
Hold your tongue and wait and see.