Of all creation’s gifts
With which our species is arrayed
The good Lord gave us language
By which means we may persuade

Without this great ability
Our world would be appalling
And all our interactions
Would be bites and blows and mauling

Those who have this skill in spades
Owe the gift a debt
And they must wage a war—of words
At every chance they get

I know a man who’s fought against
The hacks and flacks and Gollums
With broadcast, comment, questioning
Twelve books and countless columns

And now at MSNBC
Which some may view as slanted
Our favorite host is hired
And another chance is grated

Once there, he will establish
A conservative presidio
Where, like his favorite hoopster
He will take his skills to video

His interviews on camera
Will all be great successes
Provided that his guests admit
They know who Alger Hess is

He had to give up other gigs
Which with this gig competes
No longer will have a hand
In writing Donald’s tweets

How did they land this talent?
What was the big inducer?
Word is they had to guarantee
They’d give him a producer

So please accept best wishes
And delighted exclamations
From your listeners and Tribbles
A sincere, Congratulations!